Work-Life Harmony: Addressing Common Gaps in Time Management & Prioritization

Now that you've decided that you need to spend more of your time with family, your personal interests, or even to take an actual lunch break ... it's understandable that you'd turn to these tools to help you. If you are going to use them, you want to use them to benefit you.

Just to take care of any low hanging fruit - in case if it is your use of the tools that is truly holding you back - here are a few common mistakes that people make. Then, I'll address why time management tools doesn't solve your problems.

Time Matrix Overview

The most commonly used prioritization tool is a time matrix like Eisenhower or Covey. By looking at what is Urgent and Important, priorities and generalized recommendations are made for what actions to take. It's a pretty simple approach bucketing goals or activities into high and low for both Importance and Urgency. 

There are some providers of training on the Eisenhower or Covey Time Matrix that emphasize the importance of including career and personal goals in the time matrix. Others only include a perspective from work. Time is limited and you have to look at managing it holistically for all dimensions of your life.

You may already be aware of some of the key steps needed to make get this tool to work. To ensure we are on the same page I'll call out a few.

Definition of Urgent

• First pass usually starts with dividing the goals or activities into those that have a deadline (high urgency) and does not have a deadline (low urgency). Then competing a rough cut sort by due date.
• Crisis and emergencies are always pretty clear whether it is at work or at home. Other time bound activities like personal appointments, financial due dates, family agreed upon events are also pretty easy to fit on the spectrum of Highly Urgent to Not Urgent. 
• The biggest watchout is to make sure that you are looking at how much time and effort is needed to get these done. Just because a due date is in the future doesn't mean that there isn't a critical path or time bound activity that needs to occur today.
• There's a grey zone in regularly occurring events, ones that you and your loved ones have agreed that it is okay for you to periodically miss. 

Definition of Important

• The difference between nice-to-do (low importance) and need-to-do (high importance) is pretty easy for most. You will need to get a bit deeper to make sure you can have clarity on personal priorities versus work priorities. 
• Need to Do: WIGs vs PIGs  
  • The first time I learned this tool, the instructor's emphasis on Wildly Important Goals (WIGs) vs Pretty Important Goals (PIGs) left a strong memory. It is easy to get overloaded in the high importance category if there is not a clear distinction. There are times when there are PIGs that get forced into a lower priority because there is simply not enough time.
  • For work, the difference between these is usually defined and driven by vision, annual plans and other strategy documents. Career development goals and personal goals for bonus pay out are often well laid out in the annual performance management cycle.
    • If not, get some clarity and alignment with your upline. This will probably be a quick win to reduce stress as you get more focused on what specifically is required for your team and your personal success.
  • For personal life, there are plenty of responsibilities in this space that are only yours to do and the stakes are high if you don't take care of them. Below is a short practical exercise to check that you are getting enough clarity and alignment with your loved ones.

Practical Exercise:

Take a moment to buildout what you believe are the definitions for the 4 quadrants for activities in your personal life. Here are a few questions to get you started. What is the distinction for you and your family between Wildly Important Goals and Pretty Important Goals? What activities are you and your loved ones okay with you missing? What is your body and mind (or health care provider) telling you is holding you back and putting your overall health and well-being at risk? What activities that you have sacrificed are wearing down on your spirit? What holes do you feel in your being? If you asked each of your loved ones these questions, would they say the same?

Taking Action Once Prioritized

• There are a few activities that are only yours to do. (Just because it is uncomfortable or you don't want to, does not mean you should deprioritize it.)
• A common error is to get so focused on High Urgency & High Importance activities or goals that you forget to action the other quadrants.
  • Decisions need to be made on when and how you will get those important, non-urgent items done. They can't be deferred forever. If they can be deferred forever, it means that it is NOT important - it's a wish or a bucket-list item.
  • Delegating does not mean dumping. Follow up is required, so plan for it.
  • Deleting may still require that you communicate with someone. That update that you classify as unimportant may have a data element that is needed by someone else.

Only So Many Hours

• The time matrix does not take in account duration or complexity. You may have to cut deeper into defining the High Urgency / High Importance quadrant, if this work exceeds the time available. 

Final Note for Prioritizing Personal Life

As you seek to use a prioritization time matrix to include all the dimensions of your personal life, it becomes even more important to feel that you have addressed these common challenges. Any current gaps using this time matrix may already be adding strain or stress to your day.

Also, you may be so used to putting work before everything else that it is hard to holistically prioritize. Real life is more complex than a 2 by 2 matrix! There are real repercussions (you may be experiencing some of these now in your life) if you treat this as a paper exercise. 

• If you are low energy and irritable because of sacrificing too much sleep or hangry from skipping meals to save time, you are not helping anyone at work or at home.
• If you miss enough ball games or dance recitals, your nomination of Parent of the Year may be in jeopardy. 
• Getting home late or being distracted over dinner only can go on for so long before feelings are hurt and tension rises in relationships.
• You can't keep handing out rain-checks to your parents for the next time you are going to call or see them.

Even if you are using this tool perfectly, though it won't solve your problems with stress and working too much. Achieving work-life harmony is about more than just time management; it requires a holistic transformation.

Time Management Tools Are Not A Magic Pill or Silver Bullet

While it’s tempting to think mastering tools like the time matrix or a better calendar or productivity hack will solve your problem, the truth is, it won’t be enough. To truly reclaim your time, energy, and peace, you need to shift your thinking from simply "managing time" to living differently. There's a time and a place for them, but not as a solution for stress recovery and work-life harmony.

Misconception #1: Prioritizing Tasks Solves the Problem

What’s Really Happening:

Tools like the Eisenhower or Covey Time Matrix bucket your tasks into high and low urgency and importance. While this helps, the problem isn’t just the tasks—it’s the mindset behind them. Often, professionals mistakenly believe that if they categorize tasks better, they’ll find balance. But that’s not the case.

Why It’s Misleading:

Simply moving tasks around a grid doesn’t get at the root cause: you’re trying to do too much and be everything to everyone. Even if you perfectly prioritize tasks, if you’re operating from a belief that more work equals more value, you’ll always feel overwhelmed. Your worth isn’t tied to your productivity.

The Mindset Shift:

Begin to see your identity and success through the lens of your faith and God’s plan for your life—not through your to-do list. Reframing your thinking in this way allows you to break the cycle of stress and overwork.

Journal Prompt:

What tasks do you continue to prioritize that don’t align with God’s plan for your life? What might you be avoiding by keeping these tasks on your list? Reflect on what it means to surrender control over your to-do list.

RELATED: TBD 

Misconception #2: You Can Fit Everything Into the Matrix

What’s Really Happening:

Many people assume they can simply use the time matrix to fit all their work and personal goals together neatly. But what if there’s too much to fit? What if you’re living out of alignment with your deeper values?

Why It’s Misleading:

The matrix doesn’t take into account the emotional and spiritual reasons why you overwork. You might be using work as a way to avoid deeper emotional pain or a sense of disconnection from your family, faith, or self. Prioritizing tasks won’t fix that.

The Mindset Shift: 

Take a step back and ask yourself, Why am I doing so much? What is driving me to take on this level of work or responsibility? Often, the answers lie deeper—fear of failure, avoiding relational conflict, or a subconscious belief that you don’t deserve rest. A time matrix won’t resolve these inner battles; only by confronting them can you truly find balance.

Practical Exercise:

List your current tasks and goals. Now, ask yourself: How many of these are driven by fear (fear of not being enough, of failure, of letting others down)? How many are truly in line with your values and faith? Begin to eliminate tasks that aren’t aligned.

RELATED: TBD 

Misconception #3: Delegation & Prioritization Alone Will Free Up Your Time

What’s Really Happening: 

You may believe that if you just delegate more or prioritize better, you’ll find the time for the important things in life—family, health, spiritual growth. But the real challenge lies not in delegation, but in the beliefs that drive your busyness.

Why It’s Misleading: 

Delegating or deleting tasks without a deeper examination of your mindset doesn’t free you from the stress cycle. You may still be driven by an underlying belief that if you slow down, you’ll fall behind—or that you need to prove your worth by how much you accomplish. This keeps you on the hamster wheel of stress, even if you’ve organized your tasks perfectly.

The Mindset Shift: 

The key to true work-life harmony isn’t just in delegation or better prioritization. It’s in letting go of control and learning to trust God with your career, your family, and your future. When you stop tying your worth to productivity and start aligning your actions with faith, the pressure starts to lift.

Journal Prompt: 

Reflect on where you’ve been afraid to let go or trust others with tasks. What deeper fear is at the root of this? Pray and ask for God’s guidance in surrendering control over these areas of your life.

RELATED: TBD 

Are You Willing to Experiment for Yourself?

Objections

I can hear you ... "I'm already praying for a 25th hour and other respite. I don't have time for introspection. I barely have time and energy for what I am doing with loved ones." Don't think of this as a big exercise - it can be a week to week steady improvement. 

To start small, if it is more comfortable and within your current capability, use the time management tools that you are comfortable with and already incorporates into your existing planning and scheduling workflows. Just start with including a weekly scheduling discussion with loved ones (or implement one). There is value in this conversation and being realistic and authentic. You will end up with something that you feel better about than you do today. At a minimum, as you and your loved ones align on what is important & urgent, you will start to feel less stressed. You'll also have opportunities for self-evaulation to start creating the self-awareness of what is truly driving your actions and decisions.

Only So Many Hours: The Need for a New Approach

Keep in mind, time management tools are helpful, but they only scratch the surface. True work-life harmony comes from a holistic transformation—one where you understand that you are more than your work and that your worth comes from being a child of God, not from your productivity.

RELATED: TBD

My hope for you...

Willingness for a Different Approach

Even if you decide to DIY with the suggestions I provided on the time matrix, I hope that you are able to slow down and start enjoying more of your time on activities that nourish your body, mind, spirit and relationships. Living outside of the hectic expectations of 24/7 lifestyle will reward you far more than just less stress, more energy, and better relationships.

As you find time, I hope that you do the exercises suggested to build self-awareness of what is at the root of your chronic stress and overwork. The learnings from these will help you realize that work-life balance can be a faith-driven transformation, rather than a time management exercise. 

If you want to take the next step, check out this guide to take steps toward your goals of reducing stress and improving work-life balance! It all starts by anchoring in your Christian identity and then developing a strategy of tiny habits. (The opening exercises may also help you as you use a time matrix.) When you have no time or energy, tiny habits (in combination with mindset) are the best way to make changes. Small behaviors build onto each other over time, leading to big changes so you can thrive and flourish as God intends for you.

Final Thoughts: Surrender to God for True Serenity & Stress Relief

When you find prioritizing hard, remember that you don’t have to do it alone. God can help you. Surrender to God’s wisdom and allow the Holy Spirit to guide you. You’ll find the strength to make the difficult decisions and the courage to step back from busyness into true peace. Leaning more into Him when you don't have enough time or energy grows your character, so you can flourish.

Taking small steps toward this shift can help you break free from the cycle of overwork and stress. It’s not about squeezing more into your day—it’s about living with intention, trusting in God’s plan, and understanding that you can achieve balance, not by doing more, but by doing what matters most.